What A Year!
525,600 Minutes (Thanks RENT!)
How do you measure a year?
I entered July 2020 at my lowest point mentally, physically, and emotionally. My eating disorder took full control and I was on the verge of losing it all. On July 4th, my husband expressed his concerns and opened my eyes to the situation. I spoke with my doctor the following week and started treatment.
A year later, I sit here reflecting on the hike that brought me to today. The last year has been daunting at times with days I just wanted to give up. But then there have been other days that I felt like I was on top of the world. Through it all, the last year has been a remarkable journey of discovery.
I’m often asked the question, where are you in recovery? I’m not sure how I feel about this question. There is no roadmap to follow. This MY recovery journey. I’ve got a wonderful support team around me, but they are simply my guides. It’s up to me to blaze MY trail.
I could use numbers and remark that my weight has been restored. But no number will ever define me again!
I could mention all the foods I’m eating again, but that’s not accurate because an eating disorder is about A LOT more than food.
To answer this question, I return to my recovery mantra of TRUST the process, EMBRACE the process, and eventually ENJOY the process.
I trust the process when I talk with my therapist and listen to my nutritionist’s guidance on intuitive eating. I embrace the process when anxiety joins me at the dinner table or when I have a tough day. And I enjoy the process when I step out of my comfort zone and climb to new heights on the rock wall, hike a new trail, or make new connections through sharing my story.
So where am I at in recovery? Right where I should be because this is MY journey!
Here’s to another year of healing, growth, and happiness!